Life is Good: new beginnings are great
I admit it. I'm sick. After taking a round of antibiotics for a bacterial lung infection, double ear infection, sinus infection, and pleurisy (ouch!), I caught a virus while traveling to KS for Christmas. Sigh. Not to mention that Grant caught the same bug and so did our Big Kid. So we canceled our babysitter. I just ordered pizza. And it's going to be an early night for everyone (with hopes of waking up to 2017 with renewed energy!).
But not before I do one thing. Not before I get rid of the junk of 2016.
I tend to hold on to stuff. Emotions. Experiences. Memories. And not just the good ones. I've been told many times that I am an empath. I don't know if that's exactly it, but I do know that when I feel, I feeeeeeeeel. And I've come to accept that when you live with your heart wide open, you feel all the beautiful feelings with incredible glory. And it is uh-mazing. But it also means that you feel the sad stuff, too, with depth. But for me, it's worth it. I would not give up the undefinable, no word really describes it energy that I get from smiles and laughter and love...for anything.
But as I grow, I know that I need to find better ways of dealing with the depth of sadness, guilt, and regret that comes along with feeling so fully.
An idea came to me about a month ago from out of the blue (thanks, God) and I'm determined to do it. Tonight, I wrote the things from 2016 that caused me sadness or pain, the things that drained me emotionally, on pieces of paper. The people who weren't kind, the friends who let me down, the clients who didn't appreciate me, the mistakes, the failures, the disappointments, the negativity, and the pain of loss. And I put those things written on pieces of paper into a glass jar. I turned the lid on the jar tightly. And I said goodbye. Goodbye to all of those not so great things that took up space in my heart. So that I might have more room for the joy of 2017.
So here's to letting go. Here's to release. Here's to joy! Happy 2017!